Children overview
Care proceedings
Court procedure
Parental responsibility
Residence/contact
Although your relationship may be at an end, your children still need you to play a full and active role in their upbringing. You may not see things in the same way as your partner but listen to that person's point of view and respect it because you should both have your children's long-term interests at heart.
Children are likely to be upset by the breakdown in the relationship and may grieve for a parent who leaves. Children often find it difficult to deal with change and find it upsetting to see their parents in conflict. They can feel torn between their parents. Children need to be reassured that the separation is not their fault and that change can be positive. Show them that you still love them and that you are there for them and try to encourage them to share their feelings about what is happening. Above all try not to criticise the other parent or have angry scenes in front of the children.
It may be helpful to agree a parenting plan with your spouse. Such a plan is designed to help you make arrangements for your children and discuss these with them and others who may be involved. The plan contains information, guidance, ideas and section you can fill in if you wish. You don't have to fill out the plan. You may just wish to read the information and use it as a guide for discussions with your spouse.
There are a growing number of organisations which provide information, advice and help for families where parents have separated or divorced. These details are included on our Useful Links section.
